5:58 A M
March 1, 1978
Wilshire Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA

 

Wake-Up Call 

            “No...No...No...No...” A bloodcurdling scream woke me... it was my scream! Can’t breathe. My head jolted off the pillow. Beads of sweat dripped from my hair.

            AAAIIIEEE. My hands flew to my ears, pressing harder and harder to block out the screeching noise. “Stop! Stop! Go away... leave me alone!” It’s the phone. The phone. It’s the phone.

            My heart racing I picked it up. “Hi sweetie, it’s Mary Margaret. This is your wake-up call with good wishes for your trip.”

            Gasping for air I chocked out, “Th-th-thanks.”

            “Donna, are you alright?”

            “It was that dream, the same nightmare I’ve had before. It was all so real. I’m limping away from a burning aircraft. The flames...the faces...the injured people...the fence.”

            “Calm down Donna. Your life hasn’t been that great lately, but you’re going to Hawaii. The islands have always been good to you. Hey, you were Miss Hawaii.”

            “You’re right. I guess you’re right.”

            “You bet I’m right.” Mary Margaret insisted.

             “Thank you for calling. Oh, I almost forgot, good luck on your audition today. I have to get going.” I said softly.

            I willed my body out of bed, all the while mumbling to myself, “A shower, wash away the dreadful dream.” The steaming water pounded on my shoulders. My mind was still churning like it was on an endless spin cycle. Suddenly, an uncontrollable primal scream erupted from my throat. “Let my life change! Let it never be the same! Or let me die!”

  

 9:22 AM
March 1, 1978
Los Angeles International Airport
Continental Flight 603

  

Chapter One

Love and Accept Yourself 

The effort to make a better life
is worth the struggle because the outcome
is a life that serves you

            Seat belted in Continental Flight 603, and speeding down the runway at 167 miles per hour I felt three massive explosions. Plunged into paralyzing terror as the unthinkable happened, I experienced a jolt so powerful that I felt severed at the waist as my body slammed against the seat belt. Bounced and rocked, surrounded by screeching crashing sounds, an ear-splitting crack met my ear as one wing clipped the tarmac and shattered. The lumbering DC-10 aircraft, heavily laden with fuel, jerked violently. My breath jammed in my throat and the bitter taste of horror invaded my mouth. I was going to die.

            Pandemonium was everywhere, brittle sounds of the cabin breaking apart, panels popping from the ceiling at crazy angles. I cringed at the sight of loose luggage flying through the air and bouncing off panicked passengers. A darkened movie screen shattered in a heap.

            A flight attendant screamed, “Tighten your seat belts! Tighten

your seat belts!” Then another attendant yelled, “Head between your knees...grab your ankles! Head between your knees...grab your ankles!”

            Before I ducked my head, I glanced fearfully out the window. We were racing down the runway toward the rental car lot which was crammed with cars. My heart pounded in my chest. An eerie silence blanketed the cabin, as I witnessed the fear of death frozen on the faces around me. I dropped my head, gripped my ankles, and immersed myself in a strange union of dread and anticipation.

            I had heard that your life replays in your mind when you are at death’s door. My life was such a mess; I really didn’t want to see it again. Visions of a childhood afflicted by family alcoholism and violence flashed before me. I’d been hospitalized at six years old for malnutrition. My dream of becoming an Olympic skier was scrapped when I needed a heart catheterization at 16. My ongoing battle with my weight entailed abusing my body with diet pills and bulimia; repeatedly vomiting, and binging and fasting. I had no real career as an actress; only a series of rejections and bills to pay. Men’s faces passed before me, I had loved them, and they spurned me. Unworthy, and on the brink of suicide, now, my wish would come true. In a matter of seconds I would die.

            The plane was hurtling off the end of the runway with a load of passengers and a belly filled with explosive fuel. Then the unimaginable happened, and an

all-encompassing calm descended upon me. Overcome by a rush of warmth and euphoria, I succumbed to a sensation of profound tranquility. The serene calm blanketed me with a feeling of protection. At no time in my life had I felt such love. I wondered, is this what it was like to die? Was this the mysterious culminating grace, or a normal reaction before death streamed down darkness? Did my fellow passengers feel insulated from their fate by this sense of peace and unconditional love? Did they also hear what I perceived to be an inner voice speaking to me?

You were given this life!
What have you done with it?
You can choose to die or
you can make a difference!

            As the plane skidded and bounced, I was forced to question my existence on earth. I heard the screech of metal tearing along the left  side of the aircraft. Crashing sounds intensified to a deafening clatter. Seconds before slamming into the rental car lot, the plane skidded and ground to a halt. My neck snapped back and my hands fl w from my ankles. The aircraft burst into flames and I was entombed in the burning wreck.

            The voice... the voice...

Have you spent your life
complaining or creating?

             The left side of the cabin was already engulfed in flames. The right fuselage was slanted upward, as if someone had jacked it up twenty feet in the air. Flames billowed outside my window. What remained of the left wing was swallowed up in smoke, yet, I sat suspended in a state of bliss. A shield of energy encompassed me.

            A flight attendant shouted, “Come to the rear! Come to the rear!”

            Frightened passengers swarmed into the aisle to save themselves. Robotically, I unbuckled my seat belt and shuffled into the crowd,  colliding against bodies whose only care was to escape before the plane exploded and sealed them inside. When I reached the end of the sixth row, I spied the exit door, but before I could access it, the pushing from behind popped me out of line like a gumball from a vending machine. I tumbled headfirst onto the tilted cabin floor and slid helplessly on my stomach toward the gaping exit door and the raging blaze outside.

            Heat seared my skin, smoke assaulted my lungs, and savage flames engulfed the entire rear exit of the cabin. If this was hell, I wanted out. Fool, I anguished, it’s too late for you. Prepare yourself for an agonizing death. Suddenly, when there was nothing more than air to prevent me from falling, I stopped sliding. I stared mesmerized at the wall of flames. Again, I heard the calming inner voice.

 Do you love yourself?
Do you have a good relationship
with your family and friends?

             The words resonated in my head as I lay sprawled on my stomach, hands stretched out before me, transfixed by the toxic bonfire. Sweat streaming down my face, I screamed, “No...no...” Inches from my body, a fl are of red-orange flames seared my skin

and left me gasping. When I was only seconds from death, it came, an urgency to fight for life. I needed more time to love and redeem myself.

            Time to make things right. I yelled, “I want to live!”

 Are you living your goals and dreams?
If you die today, have you left this
planet a bett er place for being here? 

            “No...no...I want to live!”